Anticipating Christmas
Those of you that have been keeping close tabs on us know that Christmas Day is a milestone for us this year. 12/25 marks Wade’s 32nd week of gestation. When we made our very first trip to Cincinnati and met with our team of specialists, they were able to give us two developmental benchmarks for Wade. As the treatment he will need at birth is unknown to us now, we want to give him all the options we can. Our doctors told us that the hope was for Wade to be born weighing at least 4 lbs and no earlier than 32 weeks. These two factors will make him eligible for the immediate kidney care he may need. We are now five days away from our 32 week mark and at today’s infusion appointment, Wade’s weight estimate was 5 lbs. We floated out of that hospital today.
Phil and I have been blessed with really incredible preexisting relationships with our therapists. It feels like the ground work we’ve gotten to lay with them prepared us for these days. In a phone session recently, my therapist asked me, “What makes you feel safe right now?”
I think about the Genetic Counselors at our clinic that spot us in the hallways and chase us down to ask how our dog is doing and what our holiday plans are.
Friends that have been so brave to ask us to explain the minutia of Wade’s diagnosis.
People that have reached out with “I have an idea of something I’d like to take care of for you. Do I have your permission?” Meals, checking on our house, keeping up our yard.
“Hey I saw your porch light was out so I went over and changed the bulb.”
Parents that are farther along this road than we are, reaching back to hold our hands and tell us,
“Onesies with buttons and snaps are best- zippers make it harder for your NICU nurses to access his monitors.”
“Figure out how to recharge your batteries so you can put in the long shifts. Bring your own pillow. Have good socks.”
Unprompted texts that roll in on infusion mornings.
“I’m up with Baby Wade this morning!”
“With you on infusion day!”
“Praying for fluid and peace right now!”
Our Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist’s face today when we remarked that we are a few days out from 32 weeks. She gasped, “We did it!”
My therapist describes a vision of us out at sea. Everywhere we look is open ocean. And these markers like bouys. Anchored and floating above the surface. Places for us to orient ourselves and feel attached to something solid. Thank you to this crowd of people that has been our stability and our sense of safety. Thank you for your creativity and your bravery. Thank you for your willingness and commitment. One day at a time, Baby Wade is growing. He’s so loved, and watching you love him sustains us.
-Erin